I finally finished my ordination paperwork a week or so ago. Here is one of the questions...
I thought I would share the question and my answer with all of you. Has anyone else read this book?
1. Reflect on a recent book you’ve read regarding ministry. In what way was your heart/mind/soul expanded? How can you apply these insights to your future as a pastor?
Over the past year, I have read and reread the book, “A Failure of Nerve: Leadership in the Age of the Quick Fix,” by Edwin Friedman. The book struck me with the depth of insight and new paradigms for the task of leadership. The first part of the book traces the challenges facing leaders (“from parents to presidents”) in our current society, while the second part helped me to see new ways I might provide effective leadership through self-differentiation. His thesis is grounded in the view that our society is filled with a chronic anxiety, and his encouragement for leaders is for us to focus first on our own integrity and on the nature of our own presence rather than focusing on techniques of manipulating or motivating others.
My heart and mind was expanded greatly relative to his framework for understanding our society, and I see the ways that our society, as well as the congregation and the community in which I serve seems to focus on the most anxious members of the system rather than putting our energy into the most energetic, visionary, imaginative and motivated persons. In order for medieval Europe to have a renaissance they needed bold and imaginative leaders. For the earliest European explorers to move their civilization into the New World they had to reorient the Old World that was stuck in its’ orientation. Friedman hypothesizes (and I wholeheartedly agree) that we experience similar societal anxiety in contemporary American society, and we need adventurous leadership to pull us out of our anxious existence.
My future as pastor will continue to be informed by my insights from this book. I believe I can more effectively identify the symptoms of this chronic anxiety: “reactivity, herding, blaming, a quick-fix mentality, and lack of leadership.” To counteract these destructive forces, I can only stand apart from this anxiety (refusing to get “sucked into it”) and be the presence of change that I wish to see. I believe that I can only do that if I am fully grounded in my identity in God, if I regulate myself well (with the help of God), respond to challenges in creative and imaginative ways, and allow time for processes to mature. Maintaining my connection with God through spiritual disciplines is vital.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Spirituality versus Psychology
I haven't posted to this blog in quite awhile because (I can speak honestly, right?) I have been in quite a little “funk”. Have you ever had a time when you felt negative about everything? For most of the last month and a half or so, I have felt a little like I have been under a little bit of a cloud that I just couldn’t shake, and it really began to encompass every area of my life…
Physically, I wasn’t eating very well and my exercise habits dropped off significantly. The holidays can be a very difficult time in this regard, with all of the good food inside and terrible weather outside. I found myself eating way too much, and moving/breathing way too little to the point that I felt like a sloth (a sloth that was getting progressively fatter nonetheless).
Spiritually, I began to feel like praying and meditating was just one more “ought” that felt increasingly empty and absent any contact with the Divine (see previous post on the “shoulds and the oughts”). My spiritual director has been a HUGE asset in helping to find/create some open places to just “be” with God; not worrying about what I need to do necessarily. She has also been a huge asset in helping me to see the bigger picture – to “see by the light of eternity” instead of getting so wrapped up in my own stuff.
Psychologically, I have suffered (at times – especially this past month) with negative thought patterns, negative self-talk, poor body image, and just being downright surly/grumpy. I didn’t always show this outwardly, but it was there and would creep out at times. It wasn’t until about a week ago that I really began to address this junk. I won’t go into details, but this has been a huge help in getting out of my funk! The “exercises” and activities I have been doing have really helped me tremendously, especially with the subconscious thought patterns and self-talk that had really turned corrosive.
So the question I have been pondering is this: What separates the above areas? As I have engaged in deep/nearly hypnotic meditation and exercises, I have felt closer to God and have been more motivated to eat better and move my body. Is there really any difference at all between psychology, spirituality and physicality? Didn’t God, in fact, create us as whole beings (not a body with a soul, but a body/mind/soul)? Isn’t our brain and its subconscious chatter really a gift to be nourished and cherished? Isn’t food really wonderful and meant to be enjoyed? Doesn’t it feel great to use our muscles? Can’t all of the above draw me closer into being One with the Divine?
I think that it can, and I thank God for all these gifts…
Physically, I wasn’t eating very well and my exercise habits dropped off significantly. The holidays can be a very difficult time in this regard, with all of the good food inside and terrible weather outside. I found myself eating way too much, and moving/breathing way too little to the point that I felt like a sloth (a sloth that was getting progressively fatter nonetheless).
Spiritually, I began to feel like praying and meditating was just one more “ought” that felt increasingly empty and absent any contact with the Divine (see previous post on the “shoulds and the oughts”). My spiritual director has been a HUGE asset in helping to find/create some open places to just “be” with God; not worrying about what I need to do necessarily. She has also been a huge asset in helping me to see the bigger picture – to “see by the light of eternity” instead of getting so wrapped up in my own stuff.
Psychologically, I have suffered (at times – especially this past month) with negative thought patterns, negative self-talk, poor body image, and just being downright surly/grumpy. I didn’t always show this outwardly, but it was there and would creep out at times. It wasn’t until about a week ago that I really began to address this junk. I won’t go into details, but this has been a huge help in getting out of my funk! The “exercises” and activities I have been doing have really helped me tremendously, especially with the subconscious thought patterns and self-talk that had really turned corrosive.
So the question I have been pondering is this: What separates the above areas? As I have engaged in deep/nearly hypnotic meditation and exercises, I have felt closer to God and have been more motivated to eat better and move my body. Is there really any difference at all between psychology, spirituality and physicality? Didn’t God, in fact, create us as whole beings (not a body with a soul, but a body/mind/soul)? Isn’t our brain and its subconscious chatter really a gift to be nourished and cherished? Isn’t food really wonderful and meant to be enjoyed? Doesn’t it feel great to use our muscles? Can’t all of the above draw me closer into being One with the Divine?
I think that it can, and I thank God for all these gifts…
Friday, November 14, 2008
Beyond Relevance...
I just found this new blog (www.beyondrelevance.com), and they have a video that they have posted that is very thought provoking:
What if Starbucks Marketed Like a Church? A Parable.
Authenticity has been a "buzzword" that I have been thinking about for some time now. As persons of faith, we must engage all of life and not just see faith as a Sunday morning endeavor. "Sales" and "marketing" have a connotation that cheapens what we are doing here on this earth. What is our purpose? It it only to get to a goal - to get to heaven someday?
A guy I know (Andy Bryan from MO) blogged on a similar topic. He is talking about a similar idea - that we are MORE than what we do... Who are we? What is the point of our existence? Check it out his thoughts here:
http://entertherainbow.blogspot.com/2008/11/identity-versus-activity.html
What if Starbucks Marketed Like a Church? A Parable.
Authenticity has been a "buzzword" that I have been thinking about for some time now. As persons of faith, we must engage all of life and not just see faith as a Sunday morning endeavor. "Sales" and "marketing" have a connotation that cheapens what we are doing here on this earth. What is our purpose? It it only to get to a goal - to get to heaven someday?
A guy I know (Andy Bryan from MO) blogged on a similar topic. He is talking about a similar idea - that we are MORE than what we do... Who are we? What is the point of our existence? Check it out his thoughts here:
http://entertherainbow.blogspot.com/2008/11/identity-versus-activity.html
Saturday, November 1, 2008
The "Shoulds" and the "Oughts"...
Are any of you seeing a spiritual director? I have been seeing a spiritual director since August as a part of my ongoing journey (I highly recommend it for anyone considering it) and I am now a huge proponent! I selected a great OSB nun named Sister Laura, so that I could have someone outside of my own denomination and tradition - a truly safe/sacred space.
One of the things that she and I have been working on is my perfectionism. I come by it honestly... I come from a long line of workaholic perfectionists. Many of you who know me know that I am a pretty driven person, and she has been working with me on being aware of God's presence in the midst of the busy-ness; in the midst of the urgent and important duties of being a father, a husband and a pastor.
I thought about this in relation to the fact that my idealistic notions about how often I would be posting onto this blog do not match with what has actually been happening. I haven't been posting very often. Posting to the blog is one more thing that has become a "should" or an "ought"... It doesn't feel very important sometimes, so I have been just letting it slide - and praying all the while.
There is a lot going on in my life, and I know I am not alone in that. There are particular things going on right now in the life of the PNW Conference of The UMC that are impacting my ongoing discernment about my calling (I will get into that at a later point). Even though there are lots of discussions swirling about concerning my future, as well as the past and future of the community I serve, I have been STRIVING to stay focused on the "here and now." The people of the church I serve deserve my full attention and focus - they need to know that I love them and am not focused on "greener pastures."
Sister Laura has encouraged my tremendously. She has lovingly counseled me to refrain from lamenting those times that my visions and dreams for the future (for this congregation, for my conference and denomination, and for those of us who call ourselves "followers of Christ") begin to fill my mind, but instead to "pray" them as a way of releasing them to God. When I begin to feel an urge to speak prophetically to my current congregation / my clergy cluster / denominational officials that "things are not as they should be," I can only avoid being judgmental and close-minded by "praying" them first.
My spiritual director is becoming a wonderful spiritual friend... someone whose counsel I seek and admire... and someone who is a great listener.
I would love to hear your stories of your interactions with a spiritual director!
One of the things that she and I have been working on is my perfectionism. I come by it honestly... I come from a long line of workaholic perfectionists. Many of you who know me know that I am a pretty driven person, and she has been working with me on being aware of God's presence in the midst of the busy-ness; in the midst of the urgent and important duties of being a father, a husband and a pastor.
I thought about this in relation to the fact that my idealistic notions about how often I would be posting onto this blog do not match with what has actually been happening. I haven't been posting very often. Posting to the blog is one more thing that has become a "should" or an "ought"... It doesn't feel very important sometimes, so I have been just letting it slide - and praying all the while.
There is a lot going on in my life, and I know I am not alone in that. There are particular things going on right now in the life of the PNW Conference of The UMC that are impacting my ongoing discernment about my calling (I will get into that at a later point). Even though there are lots of discussions swirling about concerning my future, as well as the past and future of the community I serve, I have been STRIVING to stay focused on the "here and now." The people of the church I serve deserve my full attention and focus - they need to know that I love them and am not focused on "greener pastures."
Sister Laura has encouraged my tremendously. She has lovingly counseled me to refrain from lamenting those times that my visions and dreams for the future (for this congregation, for my conference and denomination, and for those of us who call ourselves "followers of Christ") begin to fill my mind, but instead to "pray" them as a way of releasing them to God. When I begin to feel an urge to speak prophetically to my current congregation / my clergy cluster / denominational officials that "things are not as they should be," I can only avoid being judgmental and close-minded by "praying" them first.
My spiritual director is becoming a wonderful spiritual friend... someone whose counsel I seek and admire... and someone who is a great listener.
I would love to hear your stories of your interactions with a spiritual director!
Monday, September 15, 2008
Politics, Shmolitics...
If I didn't laugh at the absurdity of our system of electing political officials, I would probably cry... Here is a video that made me laugh until I did cry!
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